Visit
September 30th, 2025
- My siblings came to visit. We visited all over SF and made some good memories. I won't ink them down here for fear of anonymity, but I don't think I'd forget this trip.
- I visited Oakland after work today for karaoke. I went to the bar around the BART station on 12th and heard reckless karaoke yelling of emo music. The performers must have been theater kids. I listened for a song, and in between the next group I looked around. Everyone was tall, male, and white or black. A lot of people recording on their phones to post on social media for clout. Not my type of folks, and I didn't see any asian men in the crowd, so I U-turned it out of there and thanked the bouncer.
- Another pretty girl on the train. I really ought to start carrying index cards or post-it notes or something to write my number down.
- Work is relaxed. A lot more relaxed. Perhaps I ought to, well, sort of, start pushing again.
- Life just seems to go on and on. It's going to end one day, isn't it?
- For some odd reason I feel secure. Legitimately secure. I feel a bit complacent with my life.
- Confused, really. Is this all my life will amount too? I've become too content and secure too quickly in my opinion. At the ripe age of twenty-five, it feels like nothing can really shake me that hard anymore. I will just accept it as it is.
- I started being the "inviter." I started inviting everyone out, and you know people saying no hurts still, but I think it's okay. I will get used to it in due time. Being ignored, rejected, and all that—I think that's just a core part of life.
How to Hit on Girls
Lanhful: Why do girls feel more comfortable after a short conversation and then giving their number? Can they really vibe guys out that fast?
ChatGPT: Yeah. First impressions happen quickly — tone, body language, respectfulness. A short chat shows enough for her to decide you're safe and interesting. Giving a number isn't commitment, it's just optionality.
Lanhful: I see. What if it's just a pretty girl on the train? I don't like chatting strangers up. Would passing her a piece of paper be the least aggressive way?
ChatGPT: A note can work, but context matters. It feels low-pressure, but also risks seeming random or creepy. The key is making it light, respectful, and leaving space for her choice.
Lanhful: Okay, but what else could I do that's as low-energy as passing a note?
ChatGPT: You've got options: make a small situational comment and then exit, give a simple compliment and walk away, build familiarity over repeated encounters, carry a card with your number, or introduce yourself casually as you both get off the train. The point is to keep it optional, not force a conversation.
Lanhful: This seems good. Should I just practice conversations with everyone I meet? I don't like “chatting up” women when it's obvious I'm interested. I want to signal interest without pressure.
ChatGPT: Exactly. Practicing with everyone builds comfort so talking to women doesn't feel like a performance. Show interest lightly — comment on context, give a small compliment, or exchange one line. If you want, you can hand a note at the end of a micro-conversation so it feels natural. Focus on “I want to share a bit of warmth,” rather than “I want her number.”
Lanhful: But then why do women like serious, nonchalant men? Isn't that the opposite of warmth?
ChatGPT: It's both. Nonchalance signals stability and self-control — he's not needy. Warmth signals humanity and approachability. The sweet spot is a man who's grounded and self-contained, but shows little sparks of warmth when he chooses. That contrast is what feels attractive and safe.
Facts
I am of the belief that the way you see the world incorporates all these habits that you wish to have.
It is fundamental---if you want the image of what you're looking for, you have to embody all the things the image asks for.
For the expression of content requires content. What it means to be something is the something it means to be.