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To the Moon

September 14th, 2025

Last year, I played To the Moon. This year I played Finding Paradise.

I cried. I cried a lot. Not sure if it was the flu, but it makes me zoom out on my life and get some perspective.

I'm... I'm going to die someday, aren't I? We all are.

These years are just passing by so quickly.

I skipped dinner for this. These singleplayer RPGMaker games always do this to me.

Makes me really just sit back and question it all.

Is such a self-absorbed life that I'm living worth it at all? Where nobody knows my name, and nobody interacts with me on a personal basis? My sole social interaction is through a Neocities website and the workplace?

Professional Organizer

I realize that most people with strong social lives are essentially professional organizers. They deliberately set-up events constantly outside of work and invite others alongside them.

Farmers markets, concerts, recitals, running errands, furniture stores, department stores, boba drinks, eating out, dance classes, ice skating, kayaking, bouldering, etc. etc. etc.

Somebody's got to be organizing these things, and it's mostly a thankless job. But, from what I've seen, it's intrinsically rewarding.

Acceptance?

I'm growing more content as the days go by. Just content being alone. I'm not sure I like it. In fact, I don't. I don't like being alone like this. The whole weekend locked in my studio apartment gaming.