I am kind
October 14th, 2024
All my life, I've sought the approval of others. I am an eternal people-pleaser.
I'm a low-esteem people-pleaser. Someone who's constructed a cage of hell for himself, and desperately self-loathes to an extent out of some sad attempt of freeing himself of such a self-fashioned cage.
But have I been wrong this whole time? Painting myself like some victim---painting myself like some heretic---painting myself like some demon from hell. What am I? Am I truly a people-pleaser?
Or...
I am kind
Of all the things that have happened to me---of all the people who have hurt me---of all the people who have thrown me aside---of all the people who have hated me---of all the people who have desperately tried to get me to hurt myself---of all the people that have tried to hurt me.
Of the loneliness, of the sorrow, of the morose melancholy, of the sickening assaults...
And all of that... I am still kind.
Through it all... and... and... and...
I am still kind...
I'm in tears because I know it's true. That of all the things that have happened to me. Of all the people who have betrayed my trust. Of all the people who have left me in the dust. I am still kind.
If a bird chirps, does anyone hit the bird for chirping?
If a fish swims, does anyone yell at the fish for swimming?
Why should a fish not swim? Why should a bird not chirp?
Why should I not be myself?
Radical Self-Acceptance
There's no reason to love the color of a sunset, or the busy streets during dinner time. There's not a reason needed to love the mountains underneath the blue sky, and there's not a reason needed to want to go up high.
There's no reason needed to climb mountains, and there's no reason needed to run and run and run.
There's no reason needed to love who you are. It's the same as liking the end of a blue sky.
There's no reason to change who you are.
Enjoy your life as is. That's the only words you needed to hear.
"Live happily!"