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Hinge

December 8th, 2025

I made a Hinge profile. I am getting a fair amount of matches. It's been about a week and a half and I have twenty or so matches. I assume if I swiped everyday I'd match even more. The ego boost is certainly a feeling, but I don't need it.

I'm meeting with someone this weekend and this Wednesday. Hopefully if things go well I'll invite them to a company holiday party, for the plot of course.

I've found that although Hinge has hurt a little bit, and sometimes I feel more and more alienated speaking to folks, the experiences I have had have been memorable.

• I've been going to sleep early, like 9pm, and I've found myself a lot happier with my life. I think so.
• Almost to the point of chasing better dreams and direction. I'm going to keep it up.
• To find better meaning in my palpable life.
• I'm quite tired of trading my time for money, I'm wondering if I can get money for money. But these vehicles are a bit hard to find, I'll say.
• Why, a bias for action is a great trait to have as an engineer. I wonder if it's a great trait to have as a entreperneur or human being?
• To spend time with people, you become like them. To spend time with rich people, you'll become rich. To spend time with poor people, you'll become poor.
• Perhaps that's why they say education is so important, because if you spend time in the books, with those authors, you'll become richer and richer!
• Or, at the very least, more and more white collar. What I suppose is the point is that you want to read books by rich and successful people!
• To adopt their mindset at least. Only then will you find the money flow to your pockets.
• But suppose that books lead you in directions, what if you're in a completely different starting position? Where do you go from there?
• Where are all the simple millionaires worth eight figures? Most people can do that, I don't want to read the books by the few lucky billionaires.
• I want to read the books by the satisfied millionaires.
• It's interesting to say, sure, you become what you consume. I wonder who I am up to this point. I will say that the words I choose to write on this blog have certainly separated me from the bulk of humanity.
• But no, I say this, I feel this, but the truth of it is that the words I have written on this blog have confirmed my similarity with the bulk of humanity. The only difference is that I am so blatantly obvious with my blasphemous and offensive takes here.
• It's true. I have a superiority complex. But at the same time an inferiority complex, and at the same time perfectly secure. IT's all the feelings I feel, and it's all the feelings I am. It's true.
• The words obfusicate my internal humanity, common to us all.
• And in that, I feel a bit alienated.
• At the ripe age of twenty-five, I wonder, I wonder what is to be done? To be done about the commonality I share with the world?
• It's true, it's so true. It's true that of all.
• Why, the words are the furthest way from the truth, and yet I continue to feel the need to write. To etch corrosion as Mishima puts. Don't you see it? To really listen is to seek the world as it is, not what you think it is. Not what you say it is. Not what you feel it is. No. What it is.
• To live the dream, or to see the dream? To continue to dream at all?
• What is the world? What are goals? What is it all?
• I don't know the answer.
• But a bias for action is what is going to pull me into places and directions. It's true.

Can I waste all your time here on the sidewalk?
Can I stand in your light just for a while?
I've waited around and oh no, you are not around
Having a hard time watching you

• What is the world to be?
• I don't know.
• What we ought to do.
• An existential crisis. But the suffering.
• Why the suffering is just a word—is it not that the strongest emotions guide us in our lives?
• It's that the strongest words are the strongest emotions—the way we feel, the way we interpret our world, we're all bound by the language, but beyond it, to really listen, that's where freedom lies, isn't it?
• What really matters. It's beyond words.
• The hardest skill in the world, in my eyes, is to listen. It's hard to listen.
• Listening is very hard to do. It's so, so, so difficult.